Blooming With Grace, Even In The River

Reflections on Resilience in Pediatric Psychology

As a pediatric psychologist, I spend my days with children who face more than their fair share of adversity. Chronic illness, medical trauma, hospital stays, surgeries, and the daily disruptions of treatment become their reality far too early. And yet, within these young lives, I see something remarkable—resilience, growth, and a quiet kind of strength that often goes unspoken.

There’s a symbol I return to often in my work: the lotus flower.

The lotus begins its life in murky waters. It roots itself deep in the mud at the bottom of ponds and rivers—places where conditions are far from ideal. And yet, despite the darkness and the weight of its environment, the lotus pushes upward. Slowly, it rises through the water, stretching toward the light. When it finally breaks the surface, it blooms in the sun—bright, whole, and untouched by the mud from which it came.

It is a powerful metaphor for the children I work with. Each child navigating a medical journey is like a lotus in the river. Their circumstances may be difficult—painful procedures, uncertain prognoses, long separations from friends and routines. The emotional "mud" of fear, frustration, or sadness is real. But like the lotus, they grow. They adapt. They stretch toward hope, love, and meaning.

Resilience doesn’t mean they don’t struggle. In fact, it's the opposite. Resilience is born in the struggle. It’s in the quiet bravery of a child who learns to swallow pills on their own, the teenager who faces another MRI with clenched fists but steady steps, or the little one who decorates their hospital room with drawings and laughter. It's in families who show up day after day, weary but determined. It's in the therapists, nurses, and doctors who walk beside them, offering support without expectation.

In therapy, I often help children and families name their strengths. We explore their stories not just through the lens of illness, but through the lens of growth. "Look at how far you’ve come," I’ll say. “You are blooming.” The lotus reminds us that beauty can grow in hard places. It reminds me that healing isn’t linear—it may be slow, hidden, or unexpected—but it happens. Just as the flower’s journey through the water is essential to its eventual bloom, so too are the challenges these children face essential to the depth of their strength and the richness of their character.

So when I think of the children I work with, I see lotuses.

Rooted in courage.

Reaching toward light.

Blooming with grace, even in the river.

With hope,

Dr. Jackie Miller

A Note to Caregivers:

If you're concerned about your child's emotional well-being, don't hesitate to seek professional support. Therapy can be an invaluable resource for helping your child cope with difficult situations, develop resilience, and thrive despite their medical challenges.

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Disclaimer: This blog post is for informational purposes only and does not constitute psychological advice.

Remember: Every individual is unique, and the therapeutic approach will be tailored to their individual needs and circumstances.